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The Sociopath Next Door, by Martha Stout
Free Ebook The Sociopath Next Door, by Martha Stout
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From the Inside Flap
Who is the devil "you know? Is it your lying, cheating ex-husband?Your sadistic high school gym teacher?Your boss who loves to humiliate people in meetings?The colleague who stole your idea and passed it off as her own? In the pages of "The Sociopath Next Door, you will realize that your ex was not just misunderstood. He's a sociopath. And your boss, teacher, and colleague? They may be sociopaths too. We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals, but in "The Sociopath Next Door, Harvard psychologist Martha Stout reveals that a shocking 4 percent of ordinary people--one in twenty-five--has an often undetected mental disorder, the chief symptom of which is that that person possesses no conscience. He or she has no ability whatsoever to feel shame, guilt, or remorse. One in twenty-five everyday Americans, therefore, is secretly a sociopath. They could be your colleague, your neighbor, even family. And they can do literally anything at all and feel absolutely no guilt." How do we recognize the remorseless? One of their chief characteristics is a kind of glow or charisma that makes sociopaths more charming or interesting than the other people around them. They're more spontaneous, more intense, more complex, or even sexier than everyone else, making them tricky to identify and leaving us easily seduced. Fundamentally, sociopaths are different because they cannot love. Sociopaths learn early on to show sham emotion, but underneath they are indifferent to others' suffering. They live to dominate and thrill to win. The fact is, we all almost certainly know at least one or more sociopaths already. Part of the urgency in reading "TheSociopath Next Door is the moment when we suddenly recognize that someone we know--someone we worked for, or were involved with, or voted for--is a sociopath. But what do we do with that knowledge? To arm us against the sociopath, Dr. Stout teaches us to question authority, suspect flattery, and beware the pity play. Above all, she writes, when a sociopath is beckoning, do not join the game. It is the ruthless versus the rest of us, and "The Sociopath Next Door will show you how to recognize and defeat the devil you know.
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About the Author
Martha Stout, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in private practice, served on the faculty in psychology in the department of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School for twenty-five years. She is also the author of The Myth of Sanity. She lives on Cape Ann in Massachusetts.
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Product details
Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: Harmony; 1 edition (March 14, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 9780767915823
ISBN-13: 978-0767915823
ASIN: 0767915828
Product Dimensions:
5.2 x 0.6 x 8 inches
Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.4 out of 5 stars
1,670 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#5,723 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
I got this book on a whim, because it was mentioned in another book I had just read. I am so glad I did. The Sociopath Next Door changed my mindset. I had not realized how affected I had been by a lifetime of interaction with people who were sociopathic or on the fringe of such, and who imposed undue pressures on my own life. Stout adeptly describes the precise and exact attributes of the sociopath, the anti-social personality, I felt as if she was talking to me. I cannot even say how many such people I have encountered, maybe it is even less than I thought, but their effects, the murky tendrils of pernicious and guiltless people, have definitely reached me and affected me. As she says in the book, the best way to avoid complications in one's life is to simply avoid getting involved with the 4 percentile o sociopathic people - but unfortunately, it doesn't always work that way, not when the sociopath is your boss and disassociating with him or her means jeopardizing one's career. Or maybe even your Church leader is a complete amoral tyrant who turns a spiritual journey into a nightmare of insane moralities. Or maybe it is the political leader of one's country, or a neighboring one, who, through claims of terrorism and fear, is pushing for war and violence or hacking away at the constitutional rights or shaking the economic stability upon which your children's future depend. Sociopaths and their effects are all around us. We can avoid them, but should we? Isn't better to KNOW them, to be able to SPOT them, and then, either navigate around them, or in the best interests of all, find ways to expose them entirely so that they cannot destroy the lives of others who cannot see them so clearly? I believe it is the last, and this book is the manual of how to spot the person who can, or is, quietly, ruining one's happiness and success. This should be mandated reading in schools, because it is a book about how to know who NOT to be associated with, who not to marry, who not to pick as a friend, and certainly, which persons will have no other interest in you than in controlling and manipulating you to their advantage. I have experienced enough of these people in my life to say unequivocally that Martha Stout has hit it on the head in this book. If you want some relief, some insight into who may have been in the background, quietly stabbing you in the back with a knife in their hand and a smile on their face, read this book.
EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON!!!How did I happen to buy a book I never knew I needed?Does anyone here remember, “When E.F. Hutton talks,everybody listens� Well, James Corbett is an E.F. Hutton for me. He happened to mention his book in one of his Corbett Report videos and I instantly went to Amazon to check out the reviews.Why did I buy the book?After reading the reviews I was interested, but it was a few reviews in particular that sealed the deal for my purchase. Those reviewers listed the markers or criteria for an individual or individuals who are likely to be sociopaths and, in turn, wreaking havoc in your life.As I read the list in these reviews my eyes must have been as big as saucers and I’m sure you can guess the rest. The person wreaking havoc in my life displayed all but two of these main markers as well as many of the lesser ones.I initially purchased the book to learn how to have a relationship with and “handle†this individual (and potential future individuals like this) and keep things under control.Let me take a moment to laugh along with you at how naive that thinking truly was....Bwahahahahahahahaha!Hopefully, I won’t be judged too harshly because my honest intention was, and still is, to handle this situation from a place of love.As soon as I started reading the book things escalated with this person to the point of me deciding to have no contact. I continued to read the book thinking I would find my solution and continue the relationship. As I read I was completely amazed at how all except one story had major elements of this individual’s personality.This book has shown me that sometimes no contact or very limited contact is absolutely necessary when someone has you in their sights. I no longer feel guilty or will allow myself to be manipulated into feeling guilty for this decision. It has become crystal clear to me that I have to make this choice for my own well-being on every level as well as that of my family. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do for all involved is just walk away. This book has allowed me to be at peace with that decision.I hope this review was helpful!
Amazingly insightful in describing our ex-son-in-law. He truly believes he can manipulate everyone and the system to get everything he desires. He has absolutely no conscience and no empathy. There are children involved. He tries to use them as weapons to get even with the woman who threw him out after years of his abuse and manipulation. This book is very helpful in understanding how his warped mind works, so we can try minimize the damage he still tries to do.We strongly recommend this book for anyone in a similar situation.
Have you ever worked so hard for so long to understand someone and you just couldn't wrap your head around their behavior? This book will help you recognize sociopaths and realize how prevalent they are in our society. A very important work. Seriously, it should be mandatory reading.
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